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Did you choose the wrong relationship?

I’m a bit of an old romantic….actually, that’s a total understatement. I’m a ridiculous, overly sentimental sucker for love and romance, whose favorite book is Wuthering Heights. I know that’s probably difficult to believe with my small person syndrome/Scrappy-Doo exterior, but that’s just how it is. Unlike some psychologists who consider themselves far too important to want any client without a bona fide mental health problem, I enjoy working with relationship problems. If somebody comes in for a consultation about depression or anxiety, it’ll be creating havoc with their relationships. Just as much as a relationship problem may be contributing to depression or anxiety. If I can help somebody find their way back to love, I’m just as happy as I am helping to shift panic attacks.

Anyone who’s met me will know that I often use the term ‘vanilla’ relationship when talking about love. I use this to describe a ‘nice’ relationship that’s very bearable and makes you quite happy, but at the same time is very mediocre. Not everyone has the good fortune to ever meet someone they just love intensely. If you’ve experienced it, you’ll know what I mean….that really powerful connection with someone, that’s just there almost from the first time you see them. Lots of people actively choose to run a mile from this sort of relationship. They decide to pick somebody safer, who doesn’t challenge them in any way so that they can live a very pleasant, humdrum, vanilla kind of existence. And that’s great if it makes you happy, genuinely happy, but what I hear a lot about is the ‘wrong decision’ kind of relationship

Choosing a vanilla relationship over a real love connection can often come back to bite you at some point. The usual triggers are; a bit of complacency and monotony in your existing relationship, bumping into the one ‘you should’ve married’ or just feeling that you’re living life with the handbrake on. Before you decide to start making any drastic changes there’s a really important question you need to ask yourself……….is this really about your relationship, or is it about you?

I’ll write some more over the next couple of days about how to find some answers.

Don’t just take my word for it...

Dare to dream big and Wendy’s THE person to help get you there.

Sam Bailey

X Factor winner with a long list of sell out tour successes under her belt.

The most exciting thing in the world is getting a chance to tear it all up and start again. Keep all the things you want and throw out everything you don’t.

Becky Sheeran

Beauty, lifestyle and fashion blogging sensation Becky Sheeran (TalkBeckyTalk)

It’s great to have a leading psychologist such as Wendy in the Manchester area, outside of her Harley Street practice. After publicly raising awareness of mental health issues and myself recovering from depression, I know how immensely life-changing expert intervention can be.

Jason Jarrett

Retired ex-professional football who played for Bury, Wigan, Stoke, Preston, Norwich, Leicester and Brighton during a 14 year career. After leaving professional football, Jason battled depression and recovered with the help of therapy and family support.

Wendy is great at what she does; she made me feel at ease immediately and really helped me work through some issues.

Tara Costello

It’s funny but from the minute I met her I felt so relaxed and she was so easy to talk to. Thank you!

Stevie Brown

Wendy isn’t only really good at what she does, she’s also really easy to talk to.

Gabriel Wilson

I want to thank you Wendy from the bottom of my heart for guiding me through what must have been the most difficult time of my life.

Raza Syed

I was told she was the best and they were right.

Noelle Dray

Although I consider myself a confident person, I was really nervous when I met Wendy for the first time. I had only emailed her before so it was really nerve wracking walking up the stairs to her office. I can honestly say it’s one of the best things I have ever done. Wendy is really normal, no in fact she isn’t normal as she is unfailingly bright and smiley even when she has to listen to me moan on about how awful my life was. It feels like having a chat with somebody who just gets you and you can trust with things you have never trusted anybody else with before. The magic bit comes when things you have talked about just pop up into your head and you start to do things differently. Wendy once joked about not having a magic wand, but I think she has.

Paul Hendry

I came to Wendy with a set of problems I have never been able to fully explain to anyone, which included grief, many family issues and alcohol problems. Wendy truly has an active listening style and absorbs everything you are saying, whilst not making you feel analysed, it is an incredible skill. She astounded me at how she got to the crux of the issues so fast. So much so that we both agreed I only needed one session with her, obviously this may not be the case with everyone but I would confidently recommend her to anyone, regardless of your problems. There was no awkwardness or even clock watching, she is wonderful at what she does, take the plunge and make an appointment, you will not regret it. Life is a direction not a destination and she will get you on the path again.

JB

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